Controlled Separation penetrates the layers of
toxicity to get to the bottom line--and
turns adversaries into advocates!
Learn about the 12 guidelines in Lee Raffel's book:
McGraw-Hill - ISBN 0-8092-2997-8 - Paperback - 6"x9" - 272 pages
About Lee Raffel
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What is Controlled Separation (CS)?
Controlled Separation (CS) is a proactive means of changing the context of a relationship for a limited period of time that both halts the deterioration of the relationship and begins constructive re-growth. Should I Stay or Go? details the 12 CS Guidelines, which can be utilized by any couple seeking to improve their relationship, separated or not separated, with or without the assistance of a therapist.
The book comes highly recommended for professionals and individual couples, as shown in the peer reviews below.
Peer Reviews of Should I Stay or Go?
"Should I Stay or Go? fills the neglected gap in the literature of marital relationships dealing with that tenuous, ambiguous area of marital separation....Lee pulls no punches, has seen it all and then some, and offers trailblazing structures and doable guidelines that enrich the couple while they encompass most of the issues that inevitably arise....A masterpiece of hope, a luminous guide through and beyond the quagmires of troubled marriage."
-Jean Houston, Ph.D.; Author, A Passion for the Possible: A Guide for Realizing Your True Potential
"What a joy to read!...Without moralizing, and through illustrative stories of real couples, Lee empathically guides the reader through the maze of confusion to the light at the end of the tunnel."
-Constance Ahrons, Ph.D.
Author, The Good Divorce; Professor
& Director, MFT Program,
University of Southern California
"Lee's wisdom acquired through her many years of experience with couples is translated into well-written, practical steps for spouses on the brink of divorce. If you are thinking about leaving a marriage, you must read this book."
-Pat Hudson, Ph.D.
Author, Get Over It! Seven Ways to Speed Your Healing from Divorce
"The 'controlled separation' is different from a trial separation or other variations in that it involves a contract and is carefully monitored by a therapist...Lee discusses a wide variety of marital problems and how the controlled separation led to a successful resolution -- either in terms of a reconciliation or a friendly divorce. I found it reassuring to know that such a well-formulated technique exists, one that has proven its worth in a wide variety of marital situations. I recommend this book to therapists, counselors, and especially anyone in an unhappy marriage or intimate partnership."
-Jeffery Mishlove, Ph.D.
Author, The Roots of Consciousness
Host,Thinkin Allowed public television series
President, Intuition Network
"Lee's pioneering work is a turning point in the field of marriage, separation, and divorce.She opens the door for couples to begin exploring their own particularity, asking what life is demanding of them. Then, with practical advice, case histories, and vignettes, she provides the tools which will enable them to honor the essence of who they are. This compelling and insightful volume combines the rarest of qualities -- wisdom and humanity... a truly excellent accomplishment."
-Rabbi Earl A. Grollman, D.H.L., D.D.
Author, Talking About Separation and Divorce:
A Dialogue Between Parent and Child
"A must-read for all marital therapists and anyone who is considering separation or divorce. Lee has created a significant new paradigm for relationships: That separation, when structured appropriately, can actually lead to healing. This book will save many marriages, create graceful divorces when necessary, and prevent a great deal of emotional pain for families and communities."
-Nina Atwood, M.E.d., LPC
Author, Be Your Own Dating Service and Date Lines
"A must-read for all couples in distress [and] for therapists dealing with couple's issues....I congratulate Lee on a creative, masterful and soulful book on the most urgent and devastating mental health issue of our times."
-Ashok Bedi, M.D.
Fellow, American Psychiatric Association; Member, Royal College of Psychiatrists
of Great Britain;
Clinical Professor in Psychiatry, Medical College of Wisconsin
Controlled Separation is the missing link between marriage and divorce. Should I Stay or Go? encompasses 12 Guidelines that include time-limited agreements that change the dynamics of a troubled relationship and halts the deterioration of the couple's toxic marriage.
For information on Stay or Go? consultations,
please send an email request with
your name and address.
For information on Fresh Perspectives Training Institute, please send an email
request.
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